Ride or Die B*%ches

I would like to think as I sit here in my cute little craftsman home while driving my white energy efficient SUV, as I carefully meal plan my family's week and strategize my 401k investments that I could be a Ride or Die Bi@#^ch.   Do I have what it takes? What does it mean to be ride or die? Who is truly ride or die? 

recording-artists-jay-z-beyonce.jpg

Beyonce and Jay-Z put it in song with "Me and my Girlfriend" and despite rumors of Hova's infidelities Mrs. Carter still proclaims "I love me some Jay-Z".  

 

Hot as f*&k Rihanna took multiple clocks from long time goofy looking boyfriend Chris Brown and despite being publicly revealed as a battered girlfriend she still stood by his side (what penis size could make a fox like her forgive that?). It  wasn't until after pouring her heart out in her cathartic and (best song ever!) single "Stay" did RiRi finally kick the violent habit.  

But lets step away from just the hip hop community...

New Jersey Housewife Teresa Giudice is now serving 15 months hard time after husband Joe took her down a rabbit hole of multiple fraud counts.  With her sentence near an end she will still be returning home to her man ...who will be whisked away 2 days later for his 42 month penitentiary holiday.  

 "One day you'll be my first b#^*ch"

"One day you'll be my first b#^*ch"

 

Let's not forget our downest B$%&^ of the country;  Washington's very own Hilary Clinton. As first lady she stood by her fellated, polka-dot blue dress staining hubby after a humiliation of global proportions.

 

But now I have to honor one of WestCoastWives very own ride or die B$^&ches of the hour. Our Calabasas-born Khloe Kardashian.  She gets an honorary mention in today's blog for going to extraordinary lengths to really hold on to her West Coast Wives status.  Miss Khloe K (or shall I say Khloe Odom), decided this past weekend to dismiss her and Lamar's divorce case AFTER her estranged husband put himself in to a drug induced coma while partying too hard with hookers.  It has been an already messy separation with disputes over Khloe's vs Lamar's net worth and dealing with Lamar's ever worsening drug addiction. To add to the overflowing water under the bridge Khloe publicly rebounded with B-rated rapper French Montana, and then moved on to another fling with NBA player James Harden. This is all happening whilst Lamar loses his contract with the Knicks. BURN!

But through ALL of this it hasn't stopped Khloe from claiming Lamar as "the love of her life."  In an interview with Complex Khloe, she stated; 

Oh my god, I miss him every day, I miss what we had—things we got to do together our just memories. I like looking back and holding on to that stuff. I definitely miss it, and there’s times I’ll get so sentimental and so sad, but this had to happen for some reason. I’ll figure it out over time, someone will give me that answer eventually. I think it would be very f—-ing weird if I didn’t miss it.

Sigh,  The heart wants what the heart wants.  Kinda romantic in this convoluted sea of poop. But let;s address what is really on everyone's mind...

 Sadness suits me....

Sadness suits me....

BAM!  Khloe cut her hair and she is slaying it!!!  As you may already know I've been obsessed with her for the last 6 months and this new hair is giving me more reason to obsess.  She looks AMMMMMAZZZINGGG!!! and if I could rock a lob, i'd be racing to my hair stylist with this photo.  But unfortunately with this 'do I'll end up resembling either a Connie Chung inspired anchor woman, or a suburban soccer mom (no offense suburban moms out there).  Trauma, chaos and a lob look good on you Khloe. So on that note, from one WestCoastWife to another-  we wish you and Lamar the best.

-Tuyen